I have really enjoyed listening to exerpts from the book this week and have found that I've been encouraged as well. I've been challenged to look at how I love Kevin and how my boys see that as well. As a mom, I have a tendency to put my kids first, but as I am reminded so often...my kids will soon leave and they'll look for a wife to settle down with. Kevin and I are modeling for them the ideal marriage. Oh no.....sometimes its not so ideal!
We can't be perfect...we are definately human. But....I want to be sure i am showing them the kind of wife that I want them to have too. Woe...just typing that hits me. I bet you everything if I saw their wife being snippy, judgemental and naggy....I would have something to say! I would not want one of my boys to be treated poorly by their wife. Hmmm...do I always treat my husband with respect, kindness and love??? Do my kids see that? I think its always good for us to each evaluate what we are modeling to our kids and truly understand the power of what we live right in our own homes.
Check out the book! Kendra has a website that I found as well. Here is something from her home web page. My friend Julie and I were just talking about giving kids independence and how they need that to grow. I thought this was good to pass on!
Here you go! And for more...visit her website www.kendrasmiley.com
Celebrating Your Child’s Growing Freedom
Parenthood can be viewed as an unusual profession. Because the goal is to work your way OUT of a job. Sometimes the idea of “letting go” is a little uncomfortable whether it is sending your child to kindergarten or off to college. So, how can you do it when it’s time to let go?
• Start now. “Letting go,” letting your child mature and assume increased responsibility, is a process. One of the goals of parenting is to raise responsible adults. That doesn’t happen automatically at a pre-determined age. It is a matter of gradual development.
• Look for ways to give age-appropriate responsibility to your child. Brainstorm with your spouse. A young child can help by bringing you the new baby’s diaper. A pre-schooler can help you clear the dishes from the table. A son or daughter in elementary school can unload the dishwasher, learn to change his or her sheets, or work in the yard. An older child can and should take on more responsibility, possibly with laundry and money management.
• Be intentional in doing less for your child and helping him learn to do more. Kids develop problem solving skills when they are given the opportunity. The child whose mom or dad intervenes at every turn, doesn’t have the freedom to succeed or to fail (and to learn how to recover from failure).
• Relish the fact that your child is maturing and changing. On the days it makes you feel a little melancholy, remind yourself of the blessing of seeing your child moving toward the goal of responsible adulthood.
Blessings!
Kendra
2 comments:
My dad said " your job as a parent is to raise them up to get out on their own, that covers everything that it takes to get out on their own". This statement at first sounds like one of those you would say "well of course". Then you think about it and it's "oh, man that's more than I thought."
It really does cover it all, the right spouse when the time's right, when to and how to everything, including when to leave home.
Steve Irby
I like Steve's comment below. That is so true. It's alot raising a child and thinking of all that you really need to do to ensure their success. Our jobs as parents is to be hard sometimes and soft the next. But in all, if our kids consider us friends, that is just a bonus - it should never be our goal to seek out that type of reaction from our kids. After all, do we always look out for the very best interest of all our friends?
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