The text message - "Mom,I had a great practice today"

Whew...I feel much better now! If you don't know what I'm talking about...read below! God is good and being a mom is awesome!!!

#49 Wants to get off the sideline please!

Yesterday was the first day of spring training for my middle son, Scout. He was totally exhausted when he came home. Kind of quiet.....got right to his home work. While making dinner, I asked how it went and he very quietly, with no eye contact told me that it just did not go that well. I tried to ask a few more questions and he seemed to be annoyed. So...taking the hint, I let it go.

About 10 minutes later, I heard him faintly say..."I don't think I can do this". He was very teary. Seeing that he was fighting back the tears, I asked him if he was ok...when he said no - I asked if he wanted to talk now or did he need a minute. Shaking his head yes, I said, "why don't you go get a shower, take a moment and then we'll talk. Let's put the homework aside for a bit ok?" He agreed.

After his shower, I went to talk with him and he showed me his new bruises. One place on his arm literally had the imprints of the football seam as clear as ever. He told me he 'got trucked' and just had a really crappy day. I could go on and tell you the entire conversation, but it's really summed up with his statement of "it's hard to be small" when you play football. He sees a spring training camp and another summer of practices ahead of him...with no guarantee of first string status or tons of playing time ahead. A little disheartening to a 13 year old boy who is sometimes a legend in his own mind.

Scout has been the same height and weight for a while now. Most of his friends have at least 15 to 20 pounds of muscle on him. No kidding. He loves the game so much and wants to play first string receiver so bad it's all he thinks about. But, maybe (as we are finding) that is not what he is going to be used for. After letting him talk and just get some tears out, I knew his heart was pretty defeated. The scenario playing out in real life just didn't quite match what he sees daily in his head, and that is a hard pill to swallow. I know what that is like myself. You know, when our real life is varied from what our ideal has always been.

School is hard and our kids are under tremendous pressure to perform and live up to what they think the goal is or what they have always thought 'winning' really is. I want Scout to learn that yeah....this kind of stinks - but let's learn the importance of teamwork and the important parts that are always at work behind the scenes. Attitude and Character count too!!! I didn't give him a whole speech about that, I knew that was not what his heart needed from me. He needed me to hear his frustration and I did. He wanted me to pray with him too, that God would move him from Corner Back to Wide Receiver. :) Ah...name it and claim it. That is when I did share my thoughts with him. That what if...God's plan is for him to be Corner - not receiver. What if?? I told him that if he is in that position and the coach is set on that, then he has to work as hard as he can to be the best Corner he can be. (am I supposed to call that a cornerback or corner back??) Anyway, the point is that sometimes we may not like the current assignment we have. But, if we have been placed there, we must find JOY in the circumstance. That part..the finding joy part, is all up to us! God hasn't moved....he's there and he says, "Count it all joy...".

I'm nervous for him today. I just want it to go well...with no 'trucking' or as I see it...hard hittin' on my boy. :) I know, it comes with the territory. And as he grows up, he'll have many life lessons on getting hit, being the smallest,whatever. It's part of growing up. Look at David from the Bible. A Shepperd boy that became King. He was the smallest boy in his family - and he became not only the boy who killed the giant, but also the man that God called 'a man after his own heart'. Size doesn't matter...but heart does! And Scout has a whole lot of heart.

As Scout went to school this morning, the verse that came to mind was Philippians 4:13. I told him if he gets hit at practice, and feels like giving up, just get up and say "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength...I can do all things through Christ....I can do all things through Christ".

He can and he will succeed with Christ leading him. This week - I am somewhere I just don't want to be. So, I will take that advice myself....and say to myself, I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength! What can HE give you strength to do today? Remember...HE can do ALL things, not a few things, ALL things! Just ask Him.

My birthday - my parent's day too!

Well, yesterday was my birthday. It was a GREAT day. It began with my husband serving me with coffee & Sunday paper in bed as he gave me my very own Pink Ipod, some tunes already loaded. (I've told you he is a GREAT gift giver) My son Scout surprised me with an ITunes Card. How fun! I get to choose and download my own songs. That will be a fun project for today. The day was just perfect as I spent the time with my family and friends. I am so blessed to have people who love me. That in itself is the sweetest gift.

But as I kept saying, this day is not a big deal, I mean, it is just another birthday. But, it is my birthday. And I started thinking how special my kids birthday's are to me. How I remember them being born. How special they are as 'gifts' to me. Then I got messages from my parents. My dad sent a sweet email about how he remembers me being a baby...and a little girl wanting his attention. My mom left a message on my answering machine just as we were getting home from church. It was during the very time I was born to her in the hospital. She was recalling what that was like for her. Max heard the message first and said, "Mom..your mom is making a beautiful speech about you, come listen". I told him to not interrupt....lets let her finish and then I'll listen to the whole thing! I did! Then I called her back!! Didn't want to interrupt the beautiful speech!!! I love the way Max says things. Anyway, that was so special for me. So, though 39 might have first seemed to be just another day for me....it was the day my parents received me as their daughter. Now, I could say...what a gift! But...I remember alot of the stuff I put my parents through. That...not so much of a gift. But they remember this day just like I remember the birthdays of my boys. Special and life changing.

It doesn't matter how old we are now, our parents still see us as their babies. They still remember all the bumps, bruises and days raising us. I'm still my mom and dad's little girl.....even at 39.

Look around at the people who love you today. I did that yesterday, and felt loved and blessed and thanked God for the people he's placed in my life. For friendship, family and God's plan for my life...which include all of you!!! What a good plan the Lord had for me...and still has as he leads me daily.

So what now?? I am going to make a list of a few things I want to do before I turn 40. Now, this list won't include things like get a tatoo. I'm over that phase I think. Really! But there are a few things I just don't want to put off anymore. Because believe me...when I turn 40, there will be another list. And a big party. Mark your calendars now. I want to have fun...so much fun that day, I foget that I'm 40! Mom, I'm going to ask your fogiveness now for the time I helped bake you a cake that said "over the hill". I think you were turning 30. If I remember correctly, the cake looked like a hill and at least we decorated it with flowers. I had no idea. Just thought it was a catchy birthday phrase. Yeah, not so much. Max reminded me that at least I was not 40. Actually, he said Mom, "That is how long God made the people march in the wild outside until they turned old. At least you didn't have to do that". Yeah....at least there is that! Thanks Max.

Have a wonderful day friends - thanks for making my day special yesterday.

Flashback

Last night, Kevin and I helped to host a party for a friend of mine who turned 40. It was all 80's style and so much fun. Before the party, Kevin gave me a card that was just an I love you card....but had some fun highschool stuff in it too. Like the TLA we would draw all connected...representing, True Love Always! Remember that??? For the record, I was TOTALLY impressed that my checkered van wearing date remembered how to twist the black jellies together for the perfect bracelet. If you don't remember that, ask Kevin...he'll tell you all about it!

Anyway, we danced, laughed and totally, like enjoyed the decade you know? :) I loved my big hair...but Kevin did say, he is glad he didn't experience my hair sprayed, blown out big hair days....he might not have been a fan!

Which, had me thinking - Nick is in highschool now and having his own moments. 2008 moments...which what is that? Will they have parties in 20 years and say, Wear your 2008 stuff. Totally insane....American Eagle Jeans and Tshirts...crazy man!! or...not. This age is not as crazy, clothes like as we were. Just an observation, that's all.

Anyway, this is just a quick blog and a pic from last night and my own personal reminder that while I was just a big haired girl in the 80's, God still knew his plan for me. It was to marry a wonderful man from Florida - that wore more OP and Quicksilver than most guys I went to school with and probably wore less Izod than those that I went to school with. But, totally perfect for me.